In my spare time, I train as a martial artist. My art of choice is Tang Soo Do, but along the way, I’ve dabbled in various other arts including Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, which involves grappling and submission techniques.
BJJ – the art of folding clothes while the other person is still in them.
There are lots of things that can be said about Jiu-Jitsu, but I’ve found it to be the perfect metaphor for relationships, especially from the perspective of training.
If you’re training with an equal partner, there will be times you push and they’ll pull, and sometimes they’ll push and you pull. There is a flow and a pattern to it, and when done properly you help each other improve.
When one of you stops pushing or pulling, you lose that flow.
And no-one gets better.